Hands. Hands of Fate.

One of the worst movies ever made, which due to Mystery Science Theater I have seen more than once in my lifetime, just got restored and is premiering tonight here in New York. Manos: The Hands of Fate was made in 1966 on a bet by an insurance/fertilizer salesman in El Paso, Texas, forever proving that filmmaking really should be done by professionals, or at least people with some understanding of storytelling.

Besides low production values, the "plot," which has something to do with a family being held captive by a pagan cult, makes little sense, and in the words of the MST3K guys, the film was shot on location in a vacant lot and every frame looks like someone's last known photo. Worst of all, Manos is interminably boring. It's hard for me to make it through the whole thing, even with MST3K commentary. No wonder Dr. Forrester apologized to Joel and the robots for subjecting them to it.

There's no denying Manos' cult status, though, which is somewhat amazing since it was pretty much single-handedly brought about by the film's appearance on Mystery Science Theater. In addition to the new restoration, a tribute band recently emerged in Nashville called Manos: The Band of Fate. Below, check out their song "The Torgo Twitch." 

And, if you feel like torturing yourself, the trailer for the movie. FYI, "manos" means "hands" in Spanish. So yes, the title of the movie is literally Hands: The Hands of Fate.

And here's Torgo with your pizza.